Thursday, August 24, 2006

what if?

met cheryl for lunch today..it never ceases to amaze us how we never actually ended up together..looking back, we were so infatuated with each other..the hand holding when we went out..the pager messages (last time no handphone la!)..the long phone conversations..my now infamous journey from tampines to choa chu kang with an equally infamous single yellow rose on a certain valentine's day years ago..both of us did not know it back then; i did not tell her how i felt and neither did she..it was only years later when we were talking about crushes when i admitted to her that i had a crush on her before that she admitted that she had a crush on me at that exact same time as well!

i guess we never really know how another person feels towards us until we take that chance and ask him/ her..the thing is, we always hold back for fear of losing him/ her even as a friend..but like i told my friend recently, does it really feel better to keep quiet and not to know how things may turn out? when she finally took the chance and sent him an email expressing her feelings, she had this great weight lifted off her shoulders..this, even though she did not end up with the guy..now at least she can move on with her life instead of pondering about the 'what if's..

i admit, i do think about the 'what could have been's at times..but i also know i have to keep moving..at the moment i am in "transit" when i do not really want to think too much about things and just let nature take its due course..there is only that much hurt and disappointment one can take..

let's take a brave jump over the side..
- coldplay


something i found in a shop at chinatown..
cute rite?
no one to give it to yet though! :P


an excerpt from my conversation with aileen..

aileen: so sat dinner addy treating!
addy: WHAT! urrr..think i suddenly got appointment.. -checks watch-
aileen: haha kns dun kay siao la
addy: aaaahh..got stomachache on that day..
aileen: wah u can predict the future ah
addy: -nodz- i feel my tummy rumbling liaoz mah
aileen: so saturday 4D which number 1st prize ah
addy: urrr..my tummy cannot predict 4D la..so kua zhang
aileen: kns so ur tummy can predict wat
addy: only whether got stomachache or not lor..like head can predict whether got headache or not..but head says saturday should be alright..
aileen: lame leh u
addy: you then lame ar! ask me for 4D numbers

update for cny 2007:

heard from my mum that my grandma says cannot celebrate cny next year..
any volunteers to hold next year's gathering then?

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