Worn Out

Finally, it's all over..seven long days have come and gone. Much have happened since then..some good some not so good. One thing good that has happened is that this past week has strengthened the extended family as a whole especially amongst the cousins..even though most of the time was spent attempting to log onto msn, teasing each other, talking cock and playing with the few magic tricks we learnt from ning..time passed quicker like that.

On the other hand, my first week at work has been a rather start-stop affair..my company has been gracious enough to let me off every afternoon to go to the wake even though it is my probation period and i am not entitled to compassionate leave. However, this also meant that the project i've been assigned is in bits and pieces..hopefully things will work out..especially since this is my first assignment..

Feeling very drained and worn out now..a part of me just wants to collapse in a heap and just lay there for as long as i'm allowed to..another part of me refuses to lie down and wants to make things right again..

One week ago, my grandpa was alive and i held her in my arms..one week later, neither of them are here and my heart is broken in two, one piece for each of them and none left for myself..

The Irony Of It All

Sunday came and went just like a dream..not because i had to work the next day..suddenly, things like that seem so minor.

It was father's day but it was the day my grandpa passed away. He, who took care of me since i was small until i was primary 5 or 6..and i wasn't there when he breathed his last..my uncle told me that it doesn't matter cuz he was unconcious anyway but it does matter..selfish as it may sound, it matters to me..at least i would have gotten to say my final farewell..I told myself i wouldn't cry but i still did. I'm too emotional, too weak..i thought i could distract myself by going for my team's football match but i was more a distraction than helpful to the team's cause. In the end, i spent the rest of the night at the beach with ning until 2a.m. just letting the warm sea breeze blow against my battered spirit..i cannot thank her enough for being there for me even when she was so obviously more exhausted than i was (don't blame yourself for anything..i'm still proud of you my dear). My only comfort now is that he is now in a better place than you and i..where God will watch over him forever. To you i say, you don't need to know how good a person he was or what he had done for me, what's important is that he was a grandpa and always will be to me. Yes, it was father's day but it was also the day my grandpa passed away..

Ah gong bye bye..

Rest In Peace and God Bless!

This Coming Monday..

I'm having mixed feelings towards this coming monday..on one hand, it'd be nice to start work again..on the other, just thinking of the possibility about 14hr days and the pub assignment kinds of put me off a little. I know most of friends are envious, "paid to cheong leh!"..well, i ain't no cheongster and second hand smoke just ain't my thang so.. But ningy is right..this is the job i have been waiting for throughout the last few months and now that i've gotten it, i should move forwards and not wonder so much..afterall, i had been so enthusiastic about it during the 2 rounds of interviews and i was so upset when i thought i screwed up the second round so why worry so much now? I told her it was probably just nerves, which is true..it's just this whole thing of starting afresh in a brand new environment and a whole new industry that is freaking me out at the moment..for someone who likes to be in control of his surroundings, stepping into the unknown is just not "normal"! In a way, i guess i'm still in control, in that i chose to be in the marketing line..it's just like we don't really know what we are going to dream at night before we take that first step to get into bed. For all you know after monday, all i want to do is "stay in bed" and carry on living my dream..

The Death Of A HDD

My trusty "energizer" hdd has died..without warning! The worst part is that it's sort of my personal library and with it goes loads and loads of data and memories..

1. 300 over poems..
2. irc friends' photos..
3. #tkgs outing pictures..
4. song lyrics and mp3s of my own compositions..
5. my monash spreadsheet and all my assignments..
6. my resumes..
7. my financial spreadsheet!
8. and much more other stuff..

Hai..at least give me a bit of warning mah..now suddenly i feel so vulnerable like my other harddisks are going to fail me soon..such is the perils of technology..can't live without it, handicapped when overdependant on it..

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To those who commented recently and couldn't see your comments, really really sorry..i accidentally turned on the moderation mode and i didn't realise it :P Oh..and i'm supposed to say this so here goes -ahemz-..My most sincerest thank you to aileeeeeeeeen..my dearest, most caring and observant friend for telling me about the comment thing..or else (in her own words) i would have spent forever (??!!) "sulking about why nobody bothers to comment on my entries"!

Some Candy For Thought

Getting too little sleep? Now you can wake up 10 minutes later every morning with Wrigley's new Eclipse Mints! Why waste precious sleep time brushing your teeth when Wrigley's new Eclipse Mints gives you immediate Powerful Fresh Breath! So adjust your alarm today and let Wrigley's Eclipse Mints refresh you better than any tooth brushing session ever can!

addy: The "Powerful Fresh Breath" part just totally cracked me up! In case you're wondering, the winterfrost flavour does taste exactly like tooth paste..only a little more solid! :P

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Read this in Forbes today..apparently nearly 50% of the world's cocoa farms run on child labour (mostly illegal)! Ironic then that while chocolates are a form of indulgence for us, this pleasure is the end product of some poor african kid's hard work and suffering.

Just some "food" for thought..

From My Conversation With J

Being super punky wunky neat freaks, we decided that we'd hate cohabitating with messy people who cannot seem to separate their soiled undies from their textbooks..but then, i decided for us, that we may not make the best of house mates either..

addy: i think that should be placed there
j: NO! i think it's definitely better THERE!
addy: there looks ugly
j: well, it looks uglier HERE!

At least you tend to get your way with messy dudes/ dudettes..

j: there's a spot on this plate!
messy dude: here, let me lick it up..there, nice and shiny!

Or

addy: i think that should be placed there
messy dudette: whatever you please -back to msning with her cyber boyfriend-
addy: really?
messy dudette: sure lovely.. -without looking up-

I think i'm over exaggerating..as always..

The Search Is Over..

..I GOT IT!! i will be going down to sign the contract on monday..and my first day of work tentatively will be next thursday. The company is research-plus..a local research firm expertising in market research and strategising..for a relatively small company or for that matter any company, their clientele is really impressive - singapore pools, starhub, m1, ministry of finance etc..though the salary isn't fantastic but it's a good learning ground i feel..was quite surprised i got the job actually since i thought i pretty much screwed up my interview and they were supposed to have gotten back to me on wednesday. The most ironic thing is, after getting no interviews for any marketing job for the last two months, i got three marketing job offers today! Oh well, God works in mysterious ways..

..i'd like to thank every single person who has continually given me encouragement, beared with my whinings and have kept a lookout for job openings for me..i won't name every single one since 1. you would know who you are and 2. i may accidentally leave out a few names which really won't be too nice now would it? :P but honestly i really really appreciate all the concern i got..

Now..it's just time to sit back, get ready for the world cup and enjoy the last few days of "freedom" i have left..give that addy a vodka lime (yeah i know it's a girl's drink..but i like it so..)! Cheers!

X-Men

Was supposed to go to kbox with karen yesterday..but the kbox in tampines was no longer there..as a matter of fact, all the shops in pavillion have eased operations and the whole place looks like it's going to be renovated or torn down. So, disappointed we couldn't live out our idol dreams..we activated our backup plan and went instead to watch X-Men: The Last Stand at tampines mall..


I shall not give the story away but both of us felt the same about the show in the end..just three words.. X-Men, No X-factor