The Best Band In The World!

Oasis are coming to Singapore! 23rd Feb..One Night Only! Oh my goodness! It's like i've waited for this forever..but now that they are finally coming back somehow i've lost that enthusiasm..I don't know why either..but what i do know is, if i do not go, i will probably live to regret it..any joiners?

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For ticket prices, seating arrangements and other details, please click here.

1900-help-addy

I'm feeling very emotionally drained these days..I think it all came about from the events on my aunt's wedding day..Suddenly i question things like "What exactly is love?" and "Why is hate always so much stronger?", "Why do i give so much?" and "Am i being appreciated for the things i do?" or is Jill from PeopleSearch correct in saying that i am "generally a nice guy" but she's just worried that i'll be "easily stepped on"..Maybe i should stop the toll-free line, 1800-addy-helps..and start a new one 1900-help-addy (Voiceover: "Each call costs $2.15 (inclusive of GST)..Readers under the age of 18 please consult parents before making donations")..afterall, why pay to help others when others can pay you peanuts to help themselves right? So pick up the phone now and dial the number (in bold) you see on your screen..remember, addy NEEDS you! Help addy!

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Christmas can be so many things to so many people..

1) to some it's the day when our Lord Saviour, Jesus Christ is born

2) to others it's a time to share and spread love (and presents) to close ones

3) then, there's always the Christmas lights

4) and if all else fails, Christmas gives you a rare thing in Singapore called a "Public Holiday"!

But whatever Christmas may mean to you, let us enjoy this day of salvation, love, celebration and/ or rest! Have yourself a Blessed and Merry Christmas!!

Tale Of Two Interviews

Went for two interviews yesterday..both for the recruitment consultant's position..The first one with Recruit Express was early in the morning 9.30am which is at a time when i feel fresh and ready to go..but from the moment the interviewer entered the room, i could feel that something just wasn't right..he didn't bother making eye contact, didn't bother shaking hands..and to make things worse, just from flipping through my resume, he assumed 1) that 9 out of 10 people who leave the SAF apply for sales positions because it's the ONLY position they qualify for and 2) that i am slow! 15 minutes, that's all it took for me to decide that even if they called me back, i may not take up the job..the fact that someone like him can be a senior consultant in the company spoke volumes in itself..

The second one with PeopleSearch in the afternoon went better, the place looked more modern and "posh" and the two interviewers were friendly and gave honest feedback..the manager obviously had a good impression of me but she suspected if i was a little too "soft" to do a sales job..which was fair enough considering that i provided her the impression that i was pretty much an easy-going person..anyway, she gave me time to think over before deciding if i wanted to proceed with the interview process..Though i'm quite determined to get the job, the company culture and the division i'll be posted into means that i'll probably get the hardest start possible..cheryl adviced that i should wait till january when more jobs open up before making a decision..maybe i'll do just that..

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Just a short update on AltereD!..after doing the Eminem review, it felt like it lacked focus and looked weird to post a music review after a blog entry..just a personal preference maybe but i've set up a separate site called AltereD! - Online which will concentrate more on providing music reviews..those interested do update your bookmarks! Thank you!

Dis-organised

It was supposed to be an advanced celebration for yaling..but the one who requested for the celebration and who selected the date did not turn up..another who couldn't confirm his attendance made it seem like it's our fault (almost 2 hours later!) that we decided to go elsewhere for our dinner..I'm not angry, just disappointed..but i guess like what the ling says, what's important is not how many turned up but those who were there..It's times like these i feel that she is too nice but in a way, it's something i feel we can all learn from :)

Hopefully CNY turns out better..

Commercial Break!

Q: Why don't India ever appear at the World Cup?
A: Because the players will set up a mama shop whenever they get a corner!

Q: Why won't any Singapore Chinese ever appear at the World Cup?
A: Because he will set up an Old Chang Kee whenever he goes to take a corner!

Q: So what happens to the other corners?
A: Look around and see la! Got corner, sure got 7-11!

Hip-Hopping!

What's up with Hip-Hoppers and their angst? Not to mention that their vocab seem to be limited to shooting people, doing drugs and having sex! If it's so simple..i too can be a bonifide rap star! Just get a few rhymes together and make it cool to do drugs and have sex..This is my debut single called "Cough Syrup"..well a few lines of it anyway..

Excerpts from "Cough Syrup" by addy-ctive

it's p**sed off we cannot do dope while we're down with the flu
and we're stuck in a room with nothing else to do
so let's just get down, overdose on cough syrup
and we can get all hot and sweaty and have a quick f**k

Word! Yoyo!

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AltereD! updated with the following reviews:


Eminem - Curtain Call

How ORD the world seems..

Monday, 17th December 2005..The day i finally got to see my darling pink IC after 6 years and 4 months! It was quite an emotional reunion..seeing my 17 year old self smiling back at me on my IC..luckily it was a tad too small or i may just have ended up hugging it! The first thought on my mind on seeing my IC was "Finally! I am officially FREE!" And then it happened..

Pink IC: What are you so happy about?

addy: You talk?!

Pink IC: Duh! Your face is on me if you haven't realised!

addy: Oh..But aren't you happy to see me? I..i mean..WE are officially free!

Pink IC: Dude! You are officially UNEMPLOYED!

addy: oh yes..THAT as well..hmm..

Reality sucks..and they say good things never last..i second third and fourth that!

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AltereD! (previously known as Get AltereD!)

To my long time followers, I have decided to bring back my music reviews under a new, ableit shortened name.."Get.." just sounds so hippy! Like i'm some bladdy DJ "Get your hands in the air! Get Altered like you just don't care! Yooo!" -bleh- And it's not like i'm a promoter of dance music! Hope this time round, this revival will last a little longer!

(A Little) In The Meantime

here's a little something something i wrote..it started with a line i really liked..somehow that line got "kicked out" of the poem as it developed..but i really really liked how the end product came out..after writing so much rubbish (which no one will know of but myself!), finally i have something to show off..hope you guys enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it..

"(a little) in the meantime "

it's too complicated
you're too frustrated
which way do you go?
when love's got a stranglehold
what's this empty feeling inside?
it's like love has begun to subside
maybe you need to break free a little
some space to breathe a little
sort out the mess that's in your heart
find the catalyst, ignite the spark
love's an overstatement in the meantime
a feeling that is only felt by the blind
love's too strong a word
a façade that's been broken by hurt
it's not that easy
it used to come naturally
not now, not in the meantime
now you need a little bit of sky
a little place for you to fly
spread your wings and spend a little time
away from love and all its kind
we all need love,
sometimes, but not in the meantime

addy (30th November 2005)

Copyright AD© All Rights Reserved 2005.

High

It's very demoralising..Sometimes when i blog, i wonder "Does anyone even read this?" and then i just write rubbish and ramble on and on..then, it's against my way of doing things and so i go back and re-read and edit the blog entry until it sounds nice and more addy-like..Silly i know but well..But i really appreciate the encouragement my friend wong (fei hong or xiao mi feng) gave me yesterday..No i do not feel that i write especially well like you said..but well, i gueess at least i should be comforted that i do still have a small "underground" audience..

On a brighter note, i had an interview today for a Trainee Bank Officer position (which essentially is just customer service for the bank's call centre)..i was kind of nervous because in a way, this was my first "real" interview if you do not count those insurance companies..i thought i got through the Q&A part well enough but the simulation part i thought i crapped a lot and did poorly..imagine my surprise when the manager offered me the job on the spot..as much as i felt that i should take up the offer, i rejected it in the end..The reason being that this is just my second interview and it is on contract basis, i do not wish to jump into something without knowing and exploring any other options which may be open to me..Sure, i was extremely tempted to accept the job offer after regularly hearing how hard it is to find jobs from my friends who ORD-ed before me..but to do so would be against my own instinct and i feel is just taking the easy way out..At least, i'm comforted that so far my interviews have been 2 out of 2 (2 job offers from 2 interviews)..of course much credit has to go to the consultant in charge - Sara - for her pre-interview briefing..now i feel that i am better equipped to face any future interviews which may come my way..well..hopefully i can find something real soon!

addy high, over and out!

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"Beautiful dawn..lights up the shore for me..there is nothing else in the world..i'd rather wake up and see..with you.."

Featured song is taken off the 2005 album "Back To Bedlam" by James Blunt.

Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire

Finally caught Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire with karen on thursday..Even though i'm an avid follower of the books, i didn't exactly find the movie that nice..maybe it's a bit too dark for my liking..or maybe it's been too long an interval since i read the book..or maybe i still prefer Richard Harris as Dumbledore..or maybe it's because Ron now has long floppy hair -eeww-! On a more positive note, the effects are still grand and really worth marvelling at..plus, Jarvis Cocker makes a cameo in a rock band at the ball! Cool! Personally, it wasn't that fantastic..but not to the extent that i regretted catching the show..

Just Like Heaven

Reese Witherspoon plays ambitious medical intern Elizabeth, who regularly clocks in 20 hour days at the hospital. Her work is her life, much to the chagrin of her sister Abby, who is married, with kids, and constantly attempting to get Elizabeth to go out more. When Abby finally succeeds in setting up a blind date for her sister, Elizabeth has an accident en route while driving to meet the mystery man. David (Mark Ruffalo) has been apathetically searching for a new apartment in the cutthroat San Francisco housing market, while attempting to overcome his wife’s death two years ago. When he finally finds the perfect place, nothing is going to make him leave, and this includes the blonde control freak (Elizabeth) who suddenly shows up while he’s busy vegetating. She claims the apartment is hers, and it becomes ever clearer that Elizabeth doesn’t remember her past, and shows irrefutable signs of being a ghost. David signs on to help her solve her own mystery, and the the two grow closer even as it becomes ever clearer that they’ll never be able to be together.

Went for Just Like Heaven with xinyi yesterday..and despite the poor reviews and it's predictable (duh!) ending, i found it a very sweet and romantic show..or maybe it's just that i'm a sucker for such shows! hmm.. Thereafter, we went for a little shopping at Bugis..wah we went into so many shops selling cutesy stuff that my "ren nai li" was tested to the max! but like i said, in such situations "Look and Look Away"..the more you touch the item, the more you look at it, the more likely you'll buy it! and trust me, we saw LOTS of things we wanted to buy! I think at the end of the day, we were both worn out but it was great fun! Not many chances left to spend such times though with her going over to australia to study and "finding her husband" in uni! :P so when are we going to drink Starbuck's Peppermint Mocha again eh? oh btw, it is a REALLY really cool drink..

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"You..Soft and only/ You..Lost and lonely/ You..Strange as angels/ Dancing in the deepest oceans/ Twisting in the water/ You're just like a dream.."

Featured song is taken off the 1987 album "Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me" by The Cure.

Photograph

Just got home from watching a play by the Singapore Repertory Theatre, A Twist Of Fate with yili, her bf and huiling. Set in the tradition of Agatha Christie, the play is a delicious comedy of twists and turns, false clues and dastardly deeds, set against the backdrop of a Peranakan family in Singapore. This murder mystery musical comedy stars Adrian Pang, Emma Yong and Laura Michelle Kelly (Mary Poppins – Laurence Olivier Award Best Actress 2005) among others performing the music composed by Dick Lee. While the play was good overall, i felt that the performance had the potential to be better. That aside though, the plot and the songs made it a truely truly enjoyable and worthwhile experience. The run ends 4th December, do catch it if you can!

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"when i look back on my ordinary ordinary life..i see so much magic though i missed it at the time.."

Featured song is taken off the 2005 album "Catching Tales" by Jamie Cullum.

I Saved The World Today

It's been a long time since my last entry..been busy with "things that cannot be mentioned"..and of course have been spamming lots of companies with my resume but no response at all..except from those friggin' insurance companies trying to recruit MORE agents..oh sorry they are called financial planners now..my bad..i am slowly beginning to suspect those companies have installed anti-resume software once their quota has been hit! but enough of my job-hunting woes..

Went out with yili yesterday to shop and to catch Oliver Twist - which most of you should know, is an adaptation of a charles dickens' novel..


Abandoned early in life, Oliver first seems doomed to life in a workhouse, where he is farmed out to a local undertaker where he regularly is underfed and mistreated. Hoping to improve his lot in life, Oliver runs away to London, where he falls in with a gang of petty criminals led by the fence Fagin and the young pickpocket the Artful Dodger. His new situation seems like relief, until he meets Mr. Brownlow, who sees Oliver’s true character and potential and seems determined to sway destiny.

The movie on the whole was pretty good..something different from the usual action, comedy, romance or adventure type of show..all the characters from young Oliver Twist to the pickpocket the Artful Dodger to the crook Fagin are very well played out without over-exaggeration..Fagin (played by Ben Kingsley) was especially lovely to watch - you could just feel the anger, confusion and kindness of the man..the story moves at a good pace as well, providing just enough emphasis without dwelling too long on each scene..overall, a nice heart warming show that should be watched..

After the show, we went searching for yili's bf's birthday present which when you hear her describe it, sounds pretty impossible to find - a wallet (must be branded!)with a money clipper, with lots of compartments for cards and a coin pouch! and trust me, it WAS hard to find..we visited around 10 or more shops along orchard road including LV, Prada and Gucci and we couldn't find one that fitted her requirement..to cut a long story short..as luck (or fate) would have it, we found "the wallet" on what we decided would be our very last stop and the design was nice and slick as well! the salesgirl was especially helpful too..taking out all available stock of that design to let us press, feel, poke and slowly choose which one we wanted! pretty amazing..super tiring but really fun! think it won't be long before our next shopping trip with jess' birthday coming up!

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"hey hey i saved the world today..everybody's happy now the bad thing's gone away..everybody is happy now the good thing's here to stay..please let it stay.."

Featured song is taken off the 1999 album "Peace" by Eurythmics.

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This past week has seen the passing of WWE star, Eddie Guerrero and Cheryl's dad..my condolences go out to both their families and may the good Lord give their family and friends strength to pull through this time of grievance..

Missing You - Ger

I know I shouldn’t be this way
But a part of me wouldn’t stay
I found it hard to keep away
Coz these memories wouldn’t fade

When will I know
How much I did
Coz I know
I’m hurtin’ you
I never meant to make you cry
It’s the last thing I wanna do

(Chorus)
I’m missin’ you
I feel that I’m wanderin’ alone
Here on my own again

Wanting you
With every step that I take
I’ll make my way to you

You never thought I’ll say to you
All the things you’ve always want me to
I never seem to get things right
But I’ll make it up to you

(Chorus)

Some things are better left unsaid
And sometimes I can’t explain at all
I don’t know how to make amends
Or was I ever wrong before

(Chorus)

No matter where you are
I’ll have a part of you

Lovely piano backed ballad which kind of describes my mood at the moment..anyone interested can sample the track here.

Missing You

Went to sentosa with jessica, yili, chantel and huiling today..despite the initial rainy weather forecast from jess yesterday, today turned out to be a sunshiny and supremely hot day! but we didn't go tanning which i thought was quite a waste..in part psycho-ed by jess who continuously tells me that she felt i was "not dark enough"!! anyway, we arrived around 11am and played volley ball (or attempted to) from then until 3pm..at around 1pm i met my friend, richard and we (jess, huiling and i) played a while on the court before the guy in charge chased us off because we did not have a green wristband (which meant we did not pay! -lol-)..we then spent the rest of the time on the sidelines rooting for richard's team as they played against another team led by chen hanwei (yeah the mediacorp artist!)..after seeing "our team" win hanwei's team 2 sets to 0..we made our way out of sentosa, sun burnt, bruised and hungry but satisfied and glorified!

Despite the red glow on my face and all the achiness, i must say i really enjoyed myself at the beach with the girls..just a short getaway from the hustle of city life..feeling the sun on my shoulders and the wind in my face..nice! hope it's not too long until next time! any joiners?

addy says good night to all!

ps i don't know why i said it..the words just came out..but it's the exact words that i wanted to say to you..i hope i didn't hurt you..

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"i know I shouldn’t be this way..but a part of me wouldn’t stay..i found it hard to keep away..coz these memories wouldn’t fade.."

Featured song is taken off the 2003 album "On My Own" by Ger.

Best Days

It was quite a fruitful weekend..went over to melvin(a)'s place on saturday evening for a 2 hour tennis session with the rest of the guys..slowly getting back the hang of the game again..though i must say the picking ball part is pretty irritating! got sun burnt for all my troubles..

Went for church on sunday morning and the preaching this week was pretty entertaining..the priest said that it is no sin to admire Dolly Parton (for her ample bossom) or Brad Pitt (even if you're a guy!) because they are also God's creations..in fact, he enjoys staring at them! haha! but..just as long as we can differentiate between admiration and lust..how true how true..i left church early though, to go to ang mo kio for a sunday morning kickabout organised by patrick - which i didn't really enjoy..more because i had too little sleep the night before than because of the company..but after all the days spent at home..a little outdoors is very much welcomed anytime! ended the morning with an "all-improved" sun tan and a bad feeling about leaving church early -sheepish look- in the evening, met celia for the Singapore Lyric Opera's "A Halloween Concert: Tales Of The Supernatural World" which was held at the Victoria Concert Hall..even though i do not know how to appreciate opera at all, i found it a rather eye opening and enjoyable change..hey cel, thanks for the ticket and the company! :)

Last but not least, i've already gotten a few requests for planning CNY 2006!! haha..which is like urm..more than 2 months away! all i can say is i'll try to arrange a date asap..no promises though..cuz i still don't know where i'll be working next year! so i guess you guys just have a wait a little longer! hehe..

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"other people turn around and laugh at you..if you said that these are the best days of our lives.."

Featured song is taken off the album "The Great Escape" by Blur.

What The World Needs Now Is Love

So the Gahmen wants more people to get married young..and they want these young couples to have more children..and so they introduce stuff like Romancing Singapore and baby bonuses and longer maternity leaves..but apparently they forgot something..something right at the root of the problem..they forgot to inform the other various institutions about their lofty plans for the country! sure there is the extra bonus and the extended leave but what is the use of the incentives if you don't get to use it? i'm sure we have heard of companies not hiring girls if they are planning to get married or to start a family soon..or what about the increasing popularity of contract based jobs? how are young couples going to start a family if they face the possibility that their companies are not going to renew their contracts in a few years time? will a few hundred dollars bonus take care of that?

In addition, did the Gahmen inform the universities as well? how do they expect couples to start young when the universities are suffocating love out of its students like its an unwanted virus? and how is love supposed to blossom and be sustained in such an intensed environment - which incidentally is supposed to prepare our youths for an equally intensed society? the following was taken off my friend's (who is still studying in a local university) blog..

yes we're drifting apart. just like how the older people forsee, because they have been through this stage. it is common, very common in fact. so common that it's the norm already. sorry but i really cannot skip my trainings and events because they are my commitments, and i am responsible for them and the consequences in one way or another.

i cant really do anything about it, because exams are just around the corner. i dont want to make a firm decision, because the workload makes me numb and i cant think properly. i dont want to face this, because i dont have the time to. not now. exams are paramount for the next few weeks. please understand.

Neither baby bonuses nor longer maternity leaves nor paternity leave nor any obscene amount of money can help in romancing singapore as long as the root of the problem remains..and this problem is firmly rooted into the grounds and foundation of our highly pressurised and intensed society which shows no mercy and takes no prisoners..and even if you had a degree you may just have to settle for a diploma holder's job..and why? because 1) you have no relevent job experience, 2) you have no first class-honours or in my case 3) yours is a part time degree from a foreign university! because of this wild paper chase..many young relationships end before they can fully blossom..many youths prefer to stay commitment-free to concentrate on "more important" things (i.e. a good job, promotions, first class honours, masters..)..and this is just the beginning of the race which is not about to end too soon..Gahmen want more babies? maybe when we are nearer the finishing line..in about 10 years time..after we get our third promotion!!

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"what the world needs now is love sweet love..it's the only thing that there's just too little of..what the world needs now is love sweet love..no not just for some but everyone.."

You've Got A Friend

Thank you to (in order of appearance) my mum (for the macdonald's big breakfast), my bro (for the tie), karen (for accompanying me the whole afternoon though she has her essay to rush), kenneth (for organising the dinner), jasmin, yili, jessica, yaling, chris, chantel and jingxian (for your presence at the dinner, your excellent company and of course, the cards and presents)..most importantly, thanks to all the above-mentioned and all those who sms-ed me birthday greetings for making today an extraordinary event for an otherwise ordinary 26 year old! What will i be without you guys? :)







Cheers!
addy

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"you just call out my name..and you know wherever i am..i'll come running..to see you again..winter spring or fall..or you got to do is call..and i'll be there..you've got a friend.."

Let There Be Love

Just came back from church..yes church! today's sermon was on the Good News..and it is so true that most christians and catholics listen and speak of the Good News but do not practise it! a truely good christian or catholic lead by example..they set the example for other non-believers so that others may learn from them and appreciate what Christ has done for them..true, we are just human and we are all prone to temptations and sins..but it cannot always be used as an excuse for the things we can do to make a difference but yet not do so..all it shows is an empty and artificial faith..as the saying goes - "action speaks louder than words"..i know that i do not always show the right way either but i try my best to make a difference to the people around me or whom i meet..it's not what we must or must not do, sometimes it's what your heart desires..it's just like the NKF appealing for donations, they tug at your heart strings through pictures and stunts just to get you to donate..so it is like that every day..the only difference is that these "pictures and stunts" are happening around you..so do you want to make a difference and live the Good News of the Lord? the ultimate choice lies with you and you alone..

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"i hope the weather is calm as you sail up your heavenly stream..suspended clear in the sky are the words that we sing in our dreams..let there be love.."

Featured song is taken off the album "Don't Believe The Truth" by Oasis.

Everybody's Changing

Today is just the second day of my block leave and already i'm bored! yeah..it may sound weird but i'm seriously bored of doing nothing..bored to the extent that i've already gotten yaling's birthday present - which incidentally is still more than 2 months away!! maybe i'll get kenneth's present next..and then karen's..by the time i get the presents (covered in a little dust and cobweb) to them, it may look like i went shopping at the salvation army store!

Met yili for lunch..as usual she accuses me of abandoning her..sheesh..anyway, she was suggesting that i take a holiday while i'm still on leave which is a good idea but..go with who la? maybe i'll join her and her friends to vietnam in december..hmm..

Last but not least..i'd like to wish celia a really wonderful birthday!!

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"so little time..try to understand that i'm..trying to make a move just to stay in the game..i try to stay awake and remember my name..but everybody's changing..and i don't feel the same.."

Featured song is taken off the album "Hopes And Fears" by Keane.

Who Put The Weight Of The World On My Shoulders?

Met up with yaling, kenneth and aileen yesterday at plaza singapura for dinner and movie..i reached earliest and as is my habit, i roamed the place and got myself a Flesh Imp t-shirt..i liked the white one with blue trimmings but remembering what karen said about my wardrobe being filled with white shirts, i took the brownish one instead..it was my first time in that boutique and i must say that their designs are pretty nice and the staff was friendly..dinner was pizza hut which was surprisingly good..aside from the fact that the garlic bread took a surprisingly long time to arrive, it's been quite some time since i've last tasted such a standard of pizza at pizza hut..the stuffed crust was nice and crispy without it being too tough..but aileen ate very little leh..i think i should be nice and stop calling her dumboleena! :X

The movie, Into The Blue, on the other hand was downright disappointing for me..instead of being an adventure story, it was more a Discovery channel cum horror flick (what with all the shark bites and shooting!)..argh! that coupled with the totally meaningless and pointless storyline made it a waste of time and money! i hate such shows..maybe it would have been more worthwhile had i agreed to watch the andy lau show instead! the only plus point was maybe paul walker..the acting wasn't spectacular but he just had that screen presence about him i guess..



After the show, i trudged down to HMV heeren due mainly to my bad luck with buses than because of intention..bought the Goal! soundtrack - more for the three Oasis songs than for the soundtrack as a whole..but after listening to it, i think it's pretty good..

On the whole, one new flesh imp shirt, one satisfactory dinner, one lousy show and one above average cd = a lot of money spent! goodness!

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"who put the weight of the world on my shoulders? who put the lies in the truth that you sold us..lost behind a silver screen are all the things you could have been to us.."

Featured song is by Oasis taken off the soundtrack "Goal!".

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Please take time to do this very short survey for karen yeah? it's a topic which all of us are very close to..trust me! Take Survey Here!

Come In My Dear

one of my really rare muses..written for karen during one of her down days..it's all pretty cliche but i liked the flow and rhyme of it..

"come in my dear"

come in my dear
where i will keep you safe
from the winds which will catch you cold
or the sun which may burn your skin
with me, you are safe within

by my side my dear
where i will give you strength
when you are ill in health
or when you are weakened by others
with me, we are stronger

in my heart my dear
where i will keep you loved
the cruel world may beat at the door
evil spirits may chew at your weaknesses
with me, we will be fearless

come in my dear
by my side my dear
in my heart my dear
with me, you will always be
my dear

addy (26 july 2005)

Copyright AD© All Rights Reserved 2005.

I Will Remember You

Three days in and the sadness is just beginning to drain itself away..or so i believe..deep down though, it's still kind of hard..but i'm not bitter..

In fact, i've got to thinking..this isn't THAT bad..it's not like those sort of pots-and-pans-throwing-fits separation that we see in the movies..nor is it the normal now-that-we're-not-together-there's-no-reason-to-be-friends type..on the contrary, we are still talking..still making plans for our sports afternoons..still irritating each other (!!)..the only difference is probably the emotional part..the part where i'm answerable to her and she's answerable to me..the part which links couples together as well as potentially pull couples apart..personally, i feel that now without that emotional pressure, we may just get to know each other better..little things which we may usually find silly "i only took geography until secondary 2" are easier to say now..rather than arguing over "what time to meet tomorrow and what to do", we can discuss her report like proper friends now..even if she cannot meet me the whole of next week, it's ok now..maybe this is just what we need to re-discover the romance..or not..only time will tell..but we both strongly believe that "if God wills us to be together..then no matter our far we may go, someday we will still find each other.." just like how we found each other (again!) 4 years 8 months 2 weeks and 2 days ago..

All i can say is..let's just walk this journey and see where the road takes us..we may lose each other along the way..we may become sporting kakis or even best buddies..we may become enemies..or we may even end up married!! for now though, if you ever need someone to talk to, discuss your work with, a shoulder to rely on, take out your frustrations on, teach you how to ride a bicycle or thrash you in table-tennis, badminton and bowling (hehe), i'm always just a phone call/ sms/ msn away..

So no more tears..here's to our happy ending..and here's to a whole new beginning! Cheers babe!

---

"true love is frozen in time..i'll be your champion and you will be mine..i will remember you.."

Featured song is taken off the album "Heart In Motion" by Amy Grant.

Don't Love You No More (I'm Sorry) - Craig David

In my relationship i always thought that i was right and that she was wrong..but something eugene said to me made me change my outlook towards this..we always want to take and take from our partners, we expect them to accomodate us..but before we take, we must learn to give as well..treasure them like how you would want to be treasured..love them like how you would want to be loved..NOT just wait around and hope the other party makes the first move..on all accounts, i admit, hands up, i was guilty, have been guilty and am guilty..

"That's when you turned and said to me..i don't care babe who's right or wrong..i just don't love you no more.."

But every step we take in this life is a lesson..and this is just another harsh lesson i must learn, God be my guide and accept..there are just no rights or wrongs in a relationship..there are always two sides to a story, two sides to a coin and three to a triangle..it's sometimes down to perspective and how individuals communicate and connect with each other..i guess this time, the connection broke down..

"Rain outside my window pouring down..what now, you're gone, my fault, i'm sorry..feeling like a fool cos i let you down/ now it's too late to turn it around..i'm sorry for the tears i've made you cry..i guess this time it really is goodbye..you made it clear when you said..i just don't love you no more.."

To you i say, don't be sorry..if you're sorry, then we are both as sorry..let's just treasure what our time together has brought us and learn from our experiences and mistakes..only through this process can we live a fuller life and learn to appreciate true love when it finally shows up..here's to you and me..God bless!

cheers!
addy

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Featured song is taken off the album "The Story Goes..." by Craig David.

Red Eyes And Tears - B.R.M.C.

On thursday, i was finally cleared by my doctor at CGH, desmond - my right eye is perfectly fine and in full working condition..but as fate would have it, the very next day, i came down with conjuctivitis (infection) in the right eye again!! it didn't help that the GP i went to and the doctor at the A&E at CGH were completely clueless..so an appointment with dr desmond was arranged for saturday morning..the thing about desmond is that he created a friendly atmosphere rather than a serious doctor-patient relationship..for instance, this is what he first said to me on saturday..

D : I thought i told you i didn't want to see you ever again!
A : I also don't want it to be like that wat..

but you get the point, he's a pretty cool guy..anyway, saturday's appointment was pretty quick..the negative thing about it was, i have been grounded from my hongkong trip - which i have been looking forward to, considering that the last time i was out of the country was way back after my o' levels! but well, what to do? doctor's orders..so instead of letting the plane ticket go to waste, i gave it to gabriel..yes, gave! it's not the giving part i minded, it's more of the disappointment of missing out on the trip..but life goes on and God will keep me strong..

So now, i'm on a whole week's mc and i cannot go anywhere because the conjuntivitis is contagious..as if to prove its contagious-ness, the infection has spread to my left eye (thaaanks hor!)..i'm feeling a bit fluey..and i'm tired all the time..maybe i'll just take this time to finish up the harry potter book..hmm..

---

"red eyes and tears no more for you my love i fear..no more fear no more fear..i'm in love.."

Featured song is taken off the album "B.R.M.C." by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

---

Other albums addy is listening to:

Who We Are Instead - Jars Of Clay
Leaders Of The Free World - Elbow

These Are The Days - Jamie Cullum

It's been quite some time since my last post..my internet has been giving me problems..anyway, quite a lot has happened in the past week so i'll just put it down a little by little, snippet by snippet..

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In the past week alone, i played 4 different kinds of sport in all..badminton (two 1 hour sessions), bowling (one 2 hour session), football (the usual 1.5 hours wednesday kickabout) and tennis (2 gruelling 2 hour session under the hot saturday morning sun!)..and my right hand is still kind of recovering from all that exertion! but still i'm really looking forward to swimming next! heh..

---

Went to the nokia starlight theatre with eugene and a 2 of my other ex-colleagues on tuesday (got free passes cuz his girlfriend works at nokia mah!)..it was a little awkward cuz they all had their partners with them so i was pretty much the odd one out..but other than that i was pretty excited because it was the first time i'd watch a movie under the stars and in a picnic environment though i must say i wasn't very keen on the show - "the island"..before the show could start though, it started to rain and we had to move all the picnic mats, pizza, sushi, my burger king and all the other stuff to raffles city starbucks..where they decided impromptu to watch the longest yard..being a fan of adam sandler, i was all for it! though come to think of it, i am an ewan mcgregor fan too..hmm..anyway, the rain was kind of a blessing in disguise cuz i thoroughly enjoyed the show..

---

In continuation from my previous post, i've been sending out resumes to numerous companies from last week..though my ord date is still some time away, i figured it's better to gain some interview experience rather than waiting till the last minute..my first interview is tomorrow with Fila! gosh, i don't even really know what i applied for! -sheepish look- anyway, will be sending more resumes out by the end of this week..hopefully! will be focusing my attention on the retail and the banking sector, so if anyone has any lobang, do let me know hor!

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Tag i'm it..argh! (courtesy of celia)..anyway, here are the instructions of the tag :

given a topic, you are to write down your answers in your blog, and then send the same topic to 5 other people..write down the names of these 5 people and link to them on your blog..go visit their blogs to notify them that they are tagged..the 5 people who are tagged should, in their own blogs, write down the name and the link of the person who tagged them, answer the same topic, and send it to another 5 people, etc.

the topic: your 5 quirks!

1. The first one comes courtesy of yaling and jasmin..i have a habit of eating my fries before the main course (this applies mainly to fast food and western food)..to me, it's logical because i don't like fries when they are soggy so i eat them first when they are hot and fresh..as to why i cannot eat my burger and fries concurrently, i feel that it just tastes weird..

2. I have this tendency to talk to my soft toys and they "talk" to me as well..i've been like this since young.."they" tend to always have a high pitched voice though..haha, and don't ask me why..i hate to admit it but it's a great form of release especially during the tough periods in life..besides companionship, i guess in a way, it allows my alter-ego to assume an identify other than my own to console me and enable me to see things clearer..

3. I have this funny move when i bowl..i will take take a few strides, do a little jump before bowling the ball..and about this "jump", i'm not even aware i'm doing it!! though in our recent bowling session (where i -ahemz- triumphed in all 5 games!) karen said that it was still there..lots of people have told me that it was cute but it's still embarassing anyway..

4. I have a soft spot for pocky (the chocolate or strawberry biscuit stick by g-li-co!)..and i hate it when i have to share my box of pocky with anyone else..

5. Rather than me putting this one in, why don't you guys leave me a comment about my weird habits instead eh?

-exhausted-
addy

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"these are the days that bring you meaning..i feel the stillness of the sun..and i feel fine.."

Featured song is taken off the album "Twentysomething" by Jamie Cullum

Whatever - Oasis

Another monday, another start of another week..the blues? no hardly..in fact, every day that passes at work these days is another step towards my ORD..which equates to another step towards "freedom"..which in turn means i have to find a job soon! though it's still early days yet, i've taken to looking through the classified section already..the signs are not very rosey, most companies are looking for either work experience in relevant fields or diploma level and lower people..so where does that leave fresh grads like myself? i wonder i wonder i wonder..but i guess, where there is a will there will be a way..or in this case a job for me!

Anyway one job that really caught my eye in today's paper is this job opening for a Trainee Music Consultant from That Music Shop..my eyes virtually lit up at the advertisement..

- Minimum 'N' Level (i've got it)
- Must be pleasant looking and well-groomed (hmm..can be worked on..)
- Communicate fluently in English and Mandarin (my mandarin sucks but i guess it's acceptable right?)
- Young, energetic with matured personality (that's me! me me me!)
- Female working environment (even better! heh heh)
- Relevant experience not required (so nice..but i've got quite a lot in this field..)

but after i called them..i realised that they did not list a very important criteria which i'm sorely lacking in..

- Must have attractive figure, boobs and preferably long hair and an elegant smile to mesmerise the uncles and the army boys

yes, they were looking for females ONLY! my first job enquiry and i've been hit in the face by what the marketing grads (me me me!) call "Sex Discrimination"! well, what to do? i just have to move on and on and on and be thick and thicker and thickest skin until i find a job..

wish me luck!
addy

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"i'm free to be whatever i/ whatever i choose/ and i'll sing the blues if i want.."

Featured song is taken off the album "Whatever E.P." by Oasis

Angel In Disguise - Corrinne May

Are singaporeans too busy these days to care or bother about moral? ok..so they are generous when it comes to pressing buttons to support their favourite superstar or singapore idol..or even donating money to charity (as long as it helps lower their next year's income tax la!)..but what i'm talking about is those simple everyday acts of kindness..a smile to make someone else's day..or just holding the door for someone else..or giving up a seat on a busy mrt to an elderly person..all these takes less than five seconds to do but yet it seems these acts are more difficult then exercising one's fingers and forking out money..

That said..could it be the fault of the recipient then? afterall, i've met with scowls when i've offered a smile to people..or people walking rudely through the door i've held out for them without even a "thank you" or acknowledging my presence (the door does not keep open by itself ya know?)..or an auntie rushing for the seat i gave up for an elderly person..this brings me to the jack neo movie i've caught recently - One More Chance..



The show is centered around the lives of three ex-convicts and the problems they face after their release from prison..it's a pretty typical jack neo production with its feel-good factor and slight political leanings..but one comment that Huang (mark lee's character) made stuck - "the courts sentenced me to 10 years..the people gave me a life sentence" (this also happens to be the theme of the show)..

It's really a pity that people these days are so self-conscious about themselves that they forget all about others..companies do not hire ex-convicts for fear of ruining their reputations..people do not perform simple acts like holding doors or giving up their seats in fear of rejection..it's sad but it's something all of us are guilty of at some point of our daily lives..all i can say is, if we expect others to care for us, sometimes you just have to care for them first..if they return the favour, that's swell..if not, you should still feel good about yourself..in the end, God judges us, not the people!

-pondering-
addy

---

"take a look at the ordinary/ don't need to look at paradise/ you could be next to an angel in disguise.."

Featured song is taken off the album "Safe In A Crazy World" by Corrinne May

x is - addy

Wanted to blog something on the good samaritans of our "gracious" society..but suffering from the lazy saturday syndrome so i decided to post this instead..i wrote this as lyrics for my brother though i doubt he will ever get to using it..

"x is"

spinning around
i'm going around
on an axis
there is no one around
no one exists around here

i'm all alone
i'm an unknown
on an axis
there are no other clones
no one exists around here

only i exist
on this axis

i'm standing still
but nothing moves
my heart of steel
it's shatter proof
so this is how it feels
when the world moves
on without me

addy (26th march 2005)

Copyright AD© All Rights Reserved 2005.

Tears And Rain - James Blunt

I just cannot believe my luck these days! so soon after getting hit in the mouth during wednesday football, so soon after having to stay over in camp due to work..i get hit in the right eye during sunday street soccer! the scary part was not being able to see with my right eye for almost 2 hours! but thank God i regain my vision soon after..even the doctor told me that he was quite amazed that i could see so quickly after being hit..guess i just have a blessed life..

On a lighter note..i got this quote from the article "booby traps" off urban section of the straits times last thursday..

"Another problem is i can't run after buses, which is why i'm always late for appointments" - Joan Ng, 25, 1.55m, C-Cup

Hmm..now if she was early in the first place, there wouldn't be a need to run after buses right? then again, i get it..yes i really do..having a bigger chest means more time taken to get off the bed (due to gravity forces at work), more time spent in the bathroom (more areas to soap and wash), more time getting the top on and more energy to walk to the door, open it and get to the bus stop (you try walking around with weights!)..ok, girls with big boobies are hereby always allowed a slack time of 30 minutes for appointments (as long as we are allowed to look! =P) now maybe that's why i got hit in the eye..hmm..

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"i guess it's time i run far far away..find comfort in pain..all pleasure's the same..it just keeps me from trouble..it's more than just words..it's just tears and rain.."

Featured song is taken off the album "Back To Bedlam" by James Blunt

Graduation Day

Today was a truely wonderful day..the graduation ceremony was so-so as expected..but it was nice wearing the gown..haha -hiao look- not to mention all that running around and taking pictures (a few posted on the bottom left of this page) with friends and family..and of course finally getting my hands on the degree that i worked for, paid for and studied for is satisfying to say the least! :)

In the evening, i went down to peninsula shopping centre to buy my brother his birthday present..when i reached there, nearly all the shops were closed! wah, to think i specially went down from home to get it last minute because i had no time the past week! luckily though, la vanita was still open thanks in part to maurice's friend, eng hwee who was "distracting" the owner with his usual nonsensical banter! haha..but he's still a cool guy la! :P anyway, i got my brother's present as well as a spurs jersey! argh..more money spent!

ok spurs match on now..later!

Graduation (Friends Forever) - Vitamin C

The past few days have been rather hectic and "suay" for me..got whacked in the face (again!) by the football on wednesday..and worked from 3pm on thursday till 5pm on friday catching just 4 hours of sleep in between..now i'm so totally shagged out and my body responses are a bit laggy..now armed with my newly acquired eye bags..i'm all dressed up to close one chapter of my life..

It's graduation day..finally! not really nervous and not really hyped up..just totally shagged out! haha..but me being me, i'm always excited about the little things which other people may treat as normal..like now i'm excited about going on stage..and of taking my degree..and of looking at my name printed across on it like it was magic..-dreamy look- well..the dream's about to take off now..wish me luck that i do not doze off or trip on stage!

this has been your pilot..
addy

---

"as we go on we remember all the times we had together..and as our lives change from whatever we will still be friends forever.."

Through Your Blog.. - addy

i wrote this back in july when there was this big hooha over the bloggers' conference..and some of the better known bloggers were at the end of some pretty mean and meaningless scrutiny by the media..

"through your blog.."

i may not know you
but now i know you well
where once was a peaceful life,
now a tabloid hell
"sellout!", cry your loyal followers
some who turn their backs on you
could it be because you changed focus?
but what else could you do?
"it had to be done", you reasoned
"this is my life.."
and so you should defend yourself
as anyone would when put under the knife
backstabbers, desperate hearts
strangers who proclaim you sweet
disapproving parents, impressionable children
whose expectations do you meet?
but this is your diary
not just anyone's step-by-step guide
while others relate to your words
who really knows you inside?
i don't
i don't know you well at all
but we will find out
when you get up from this fall
through your blog..

addy (26 july 2005)

Copyright AD© All Rights Reserved 2005.

Hallelujah - Kathryn Williams

Over the past few months, i realised that i've become "a little" more spiritual than in previous years..it seems like God is part of me in everything i do..even after making racist jokes, it will occur to me "what must God think of me?" and it puts me to shame..but i persist as all "good" human beings do! aside from that, i feel that i have gained in spiritual and mental strength during this period of time..i have learned to be less aggressive, more trusting and less impatient..there is no secret, just four humble words "God give me strength"..i read this in Rick Warren's "The Purpose Driven Life" and it has been my source of inspiration ever since..when i feel down "God give me strength to carry on"..when i encounter impatient drivers on the road "God give me strength to be patient with others and not lose my head"..when others breed mistrust in me "God give me strength to trust others as you have trusted us"..just four words which may seem small but powerful when you truely believe it..i can go on and on but ultimately, it is up to you to try it for yourself..


On a less serious note..the following was extracted off a newspaper report regarding the arrest of three illegal filesharers the past week..by the way, it is supposed to help you better understand the law???

Q. How do I know whether the songs in my computer or MP3 player are legal?

A. If you didn't buy it from a legal site like Soundbuzz, it is probably illegal. Plus, when you buy a CD, the rights only apply to the CD; this means you cannot rip songs out and make them into MP3s for your player.

Generally, it's advisable to check the terms and conditions of use before you make a copy of the songs. -- SOURCE: INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY OFFICE OF SINGAPORE"

You guys have been warned..if you think it's cool to show off your stylo mylo iPod mini on the streets, think again..gahmen says that you can be legally charged for possession of "banned substances"!

---

"every breath we drew was Hallelujah..Hallelujah.."

Featured song is taken off the album "Relations" by Kathryn Williams"

Fix You - Coldplay

I think i'm gaining weight..which is incredible! because just last month, no matter what time i weighed (after breakfast, after lunch, after tea break, after eating rubbish etc etc), it seemed that my weight remained stagnant or at times, it even went down! now, you may think that the weighing machine at my office (OSIM leh!) is spoilt..my colleagues think so too actually, cuz no matter what time they weighed themselves, it always seem to go up..so maybe it was spoilt..hmm..well, anyway, i just weighed myself the other day out of boredom and was surprised that my weight went up by more than a kg to thou-shalt-not-mention-thy-weight (it's sensitive!)!! so i was having a mini-celebration with myself and i casually remarked to my colleague in a can-you-actually-believe-it tone that i gained weight! to which he gave me his most i-can't-believe-what-i'm hearing look and said "and what are you so happy about?"!! haha..i couldn't help myself but burst out laughing (i know, i'm a looney at times! =P)..i can understand his reaction though, he is a little on the "heavy" side if you know what i mean! heh..

Anyway, i wonder what has brought on the sudden weight gain..it went up today again man..gosh..the lack of stress? the drinking? the late nights? the lack of sex? wonder wonder wonder..

still wondering..
addy

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"lights will guide you home..and ignite your bones..and i will try to fix you.."

Featured song is taken off the album "X&Y" by Coldplay

A Letter From Dreamland - Parking Lot Pimp

Have been in a rather dazed and confused mood the past week..could it be that there were too many "weekends"? Or could it be because i was one of the only people in this country to work throughout the week? either way, i think i'm still feeling hungover from working on national day..no parade to watch..no fireworks to "wah!" at..the closest thing to fireworks for me on national day was ironically a new drama called "shooting stars"! which ironically (again!) bored me till i was seeing stars..but well, what do you expect from an ou xiang pai show right?

Went to watch charlie and the chocolate factory with alex on the eve of national day..it was like re-living my childhood fantasy of actually seeing the inside of willy wonka's factory! all that chocolate and candy..gosh..anyway, it is a pretty nice show whether or not you've read the roald dahl book so do go catch it!



Last but not least, i've finally clocked time on the dance floor! all thanks (or no thanks??) to maurice (who else!)! anyway, it was pretty fun the first time..or could it be that i was high? hmm..i hope i didn't do any crazy stuff..though i distinctly remember a girl dancing up to me! haha..i think that she's just drunk la..ME leh! cannot be cannot be..

Oh by the way, the cheonging thing happened last friday..so this whole blog has really been going in reverse..now you believe me when i said that i was a little dazed?

over and out!
cheers!
addy

---

... ...addy is currently obsessed with Parking Lot Pimp's "A Letter From Dreamland"
"wrote you a letter from dreamland..wish you were here with me man.."

Brightest 2

you were always there for me in my darkest moments, providing me a shining light..like that time when i had surgery, you kept virgil by my bedside like my guardian angel..this even though you had your curfew and SGH wasn't exactly in the most convenient of places..without any complaints, you made your sacrifice in your own quiet yet loving way..and for that i thank you..and for every other moment we have shared..

"thank you"

addy thots.. ..

the whole problem with relationships is that everyone is so busy with couple-y things that they forget the very basic requirement..that is to be a friend to your partner..

now if only i can turn back time..

---

... ...addy is currently obsessed with Copeland's "Brightest"
"i just know that she warms my heart/ and knows what all my imperfections are/ and she says that i am the brightest firefly in her jar.."

addy thots.. ..

live without regrets today..tomorrow may not come round for you to regret its yesterday..

Brightest

were you at Baybeats? if you were, you'd have witnessed the largest crowd EVER gathered at the stage where local band, Electrico played..on the whole, it was a good three days for local music..the sad thing is the crowd hardly did the bands justice..even as the bands were rocking their hearts out, the audience at best were whimmery..maybe it's just the singaporean way..no one wants to look like "that fool" on tomorrow's paper..

speaking of newspaper, has anyone observed that after nearly 4-5 years in its existence, blogging and bloggers have recently been in the papers a lot? some of whom are pretty immatured i noticed, glorifying the use of their blogs to bring shame to their enemies, while some others documented their sexual exploits..they even have one blogger writing for the Newpaper now! the problem with this sudden publicity is that, a lot of people who read blogs cannot differentiate between where reality starts and where it ends..a blog is afterall a diary of sorts..so why are strangers so quick to judge another based on his/ her words? i guess it's always easier in cyberspace for all the so-called righteous and "do-gooders"..you don't often see someone slamming another person live on national television do you?

this is like the 5th day that i'm stuck at home now..not counting my days in office..and i'm feeling a little like a hermit (elinda, hermit? remember? good! haha..kidding kidding!)..thank goodness tomorrow is football day when i can get a little fresh air..ah..


take care y'all!
God bless!
addy

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... ...addy is currently obsessed with Copeland's "Brightest"
"i just know that she warms my heart/ and knows what all my imperfections are/ and she says that i am the brightest firefly in her jar.."

Feel Good Inc.

I'M A GRADUATE!! hahahahahaha..ok i think i'm going crazy! i know this may not sound like a big deal to most of you but this IS my big deal..

when i got my PSLE results and found out that i was going to st. patrick's school, nobody thought i was good enough..

when i got my o' level results and couldn't get into jc or even business at polytechnic, nobody thought i was good enough..

and frankly, neither did i..i was depressed..my father was always sceptical..my uncle thought i just got lucky..all except my mum who throughout the years always thought that her elder son could do something right and LOOK MUM, I'M A GRADUATE!!!

of course there are other heros and heroines (mostly!) around me who have helped me through..like my sec 4 remedial teacher mdm tan (who helped me pass my chinese!!), mrs liew who sacrificed her maternity leave to coach me in physics (and i got an A) and of course mdm sing of temasek poly who never gave up on me even when i was determined to! then there were my lovely bunch of poly classmates who signed for my lecture attendace, updated my notes and even had to bear with my mood swings. last but not least to my good buddy chunchyi who always attended class and kept me updated on tutorials! not forgetting God who always blessed me with luck i didn't always deserve..thank you thank you thank you all! maybe i should pursue a Masters next hmm..did someone say "please, no!"?

i'm so looking forward to Baybeats this weekend and if someone should choose to destroy my weekend i'll run him over!! well..try to anyway! :P

take care y'all!
God bless!
addy

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... ...addy is currently obsessed with Gorillaz's "Feel Good Inc."
"love forever..love is free..turn forever you and me.."

Brighter Than Sunshine

Another week just passes like that..less than two weeks to my exam results! Anyway, just watched "a lot like love" with karen yesterday..just my type of movie..i know the ending was predictable but who cares! i'm just a sucker for such stuff! :P



Baybeats is coming!! For people interested in music, please please please do go down to the esplanade on the 15th, 16th and 17th of july and lend your support to the bands performing (including acts like electrico, serenaide, concave scream and a whole lot more!!)..i promise you won't regret it..i have my good bud as a witness! heh..

Last but not least the following poem was written some time back..when i was feeling really down..i think it was when i was just posted to my new workplace..hmm..can't really remember already..

"the self-discipline prayer"

Lord grant me self-discipline in all that i do
When i get bored and restless, what would you do if you were in my shoes?
Do as you always have and stick to your ways
But you're the potter and we're just clay
And pottery like us gets molded too easily
Temptation seeks us out and we surrender meekly
Through our wayward actions, we lose both others and ourselves
And we realise afterwards that we'd have strayed from you as well
Help us be disciplined as you would have been
Give us strength and keep us from sin
If i should get bored next time and my mind wanders from me
I will still be strong because the Lord is with me

- ad (3rd july 2005)


For those interested, there is another part to this poem called "the patience prayer" put up on my friendster blog..

take care y'all!
God bless!
addy

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... ...addy is currently obsessed with Aqualung's "Brighter Than Sunshine"
"love burns brighter than sunshine.."

What If

My exams are over..finally! actually, they have been over since last monday..but since then i've been rather depressed..mainly suffering from exam stress hangover and a lack of sleep..my usually trusty retail therapy is failing me..somehow practicality has taken over my senses these days..bladdy idiot! and karen isn't helping much either with her mood swings..we end up swinging moods at each other instead! so..i end up even more depressed than before..ableit with an improvement in the sleep situation..now i don't know what the hell to do with myself..hai..


On the brighter side of things..i've just finished mike gayle's novel "His 'N' Hers"..yes another one of those sappy love stories where you'd just know the ending..but i loved it anyway just as i loved his previous books! now for tony parsons' "The Family Way"! maybe i'll start tomorrow..hmm..

Anyway, just checking in..just in case you guys were wondering if i had been wiped off the face of this earth, rest assure the force is strong in me..over and out!

God bless!
Cheers!
addy

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... ...addy is currently obsessed with Coldplay's "What If"
"let's take a brave jump over the side.."

Refugees

I'm feeling very worn out..mnday's is the last paper and i've yet to get started..still very hungover from wednesday paper..wednesday paper was pretty good though so hopefully that will give me a timely boost..hmm..though i must say the "boost" is kind of slow in taking over!!

went for my retail therapy yesterday..as most of my friends know, my retail therapy is basically to stock up on my cd collection! but then i've been quite in control lately..for example, i went to this warehouse sale, picked up 4 cds in half an hour..then spent the next 10 minutes putting all 4 cds back, walking out of the place without a purchase and feeling crap after that! but yesterday was different, i was on a mission! first i went to get the ipod shuffle (not sure how much i will use it though! -gasp-) then off to hmv to get The Tears single (which coincidentally provides for my heading this time! :P), the new Foo Fighters album and a single by a new band Nine Black Alps (if you like The Vines, you'll like this)..now that my therapy has been a success, i feel like crap again..but for a different reason! argh!

ok..it's 11am the time i stipulated for myself to start studying and I WILL! well..hopefully..i think..hmm..

Cheers!
God Bless!

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... ...addy is currently obsessed with The Tears' "Refugees"
"let's take to the streets..you and i we're life's refugees.."

Speed of Sound

I am feeling stressed and broke..Stressed firstly because my final two papers are next week..The first went quite lousily - not the worst but certainly far from the best..Not sure if it is mental block but it seems like this Recruitment and Selection module has nothing much for me to study either! Or could it be because i took a similar module last sem? Argh! Hopefully when wednesday comes and goes, i would have gained more confidence to proceeed to my final and last paper - Organisational Change and Development! After which, i can finally start making appointments with all my friends whom i have been neglecting for the past few months! Graduation is in september..hopefully the results in july earns me a meal at the Ritz!

Secondly, i'm broke! And i haven't even started on my retail therapy! Why did Oasis, Coldplay and The Tears all release albums around the same time! Now to stop myself from getting any other cds, i've decided to listen to the three albums slowly one at a time..so far, i'm still only at the oasis one so that's good..on the contrary though, the album is just so-so, this coming from an oasis fan!

Ok, i've rambled on enough, now i've got to get back to studying..wish me luck you guys and i hope to see some of you REAL soon! promise!

Cheers!
God Bless!

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... ...addy is currently obsessed with Oasis' "Let There Be Love"

The Final Lap!

Woah..Suddenly i feel a weight lift from my shoulders..Just handed up all 3 assignments today..yes the 3 which were due on the same day..yes the 3 which i've been so stressed up over the last 3 weeks..yes the 3 which i've had to cancel so many appointments as a result..Who the hell said 3 was a magic number?! Now gah-men say the more the merrier la!

Anyway, i cannot wait for june to come..AND go..that's when i'll be totally free..well..not exactly totally, cuz that'll be reserved for december when i ORD..or maybe that can be totally totally..hmm..either way, i'll be free in june and TOTALLY free in december!! The scary part comes after december when i have to look for a job -horror music in the background-

Hey! Now that i'm feeling lighter maybe i can blade faster as well! hmm..now now, why do i feel that certain people are giving me really weird looks right about now (the funk soul brother!)!

Ok..this is getting a little cranky, signing off here..

God Bless!
Cheers!

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... ...addy is still currently obsessed with Athlete's "Wires"

Shoot!

Just got home from another football match..I must say i'm improving my runs and positioning and I'm getting tougher..But one big problem i've been facing is nerves..Everytime i am faced with an open goal or one on one with the goalie i just cannot compose myself enough to score..Hai..Why why why? People say it takes just one to get back the confidence, i certainly hope they aren't lying and hopefully that one goal come fast!!

Anyway, from now until June, I'm going to be pretty stressed out..What with all the assignments coming up (all due on the same day!! argh!)..Then after that, it'll be the final examinations! If i get past those, it'll be graduation!! All these years of toil just for this moment..Hope there will be no screw ups..Though personally, i feel that the three modules i'm taking this semester have been pretty "challenging"! Either that, or it's just the pressure of taking three modules at once..Anyway, it's the final lap and i don't intend to give up so easily! -grits teeth-

Last but not least, sorry to kenneth, raymond and aileen (who INSISTS that she agreed to come out just for me!!) that i couldn't meet them for dinner today..I'm just too mentally and physically tired to want to do anything but stay home and slack..

Until i find time and energy to fill up this page again..Take care y'all and God Bless! Cheers!

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... ...addy is currently obsessed with Athlete's "Wires"

Can't Take My Eyes Off You..

So many differing opinions but no conclusive answer..Is it wrong to have a crush when one's attached? I mean, in extreme cases i'm pretty certain some guys have crushes on the sister of their girlfriend or their girlfriend's best friend..And i am sure the girls are as guilty of such thoughts! As maurice pointed out, it's alright to have crushes and to have options before marriage and not after! The tricky part however, is how to keep it just as that - a crush? When do you consider the line being stepped over? And when do you cross the line? A more conservative view will be that even having a crush on someone when you're attached is considered cheating on your partner..Which do you support? For me, i believe having crushes is alright and normal..And when it comes to a situation that a decision has to be made, just go with both your heart and mind (even if it may be the wrong one in the end)..Like maurice said, this is your only chance, even if you fail at least you won't regret not trying..Well said, my man..Sometimes i wished i remembered how it feels like to have a crush..For now i guess i'll just have to make do with the orange type!

Oh yeah and before i forget, a belated Happy New Year to all! :)

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... ...addy is currently obsessed with Lifehouse's "Breathing"